Dear Ryan Owen

Today work was...interesting - to say the least.  Remember when I worked here last time, and I used to come home almost every night complaining about what a bully one of my managers was?  You remember which one - you said several times you didn't care for him either.  He still works there, bummer for me because since I just took off - he already didn't respect me for some reason, and that just added to it.  He's engaged now, so that makes it worse because remember I told you we used to like each other?? I get the feeling he feels like that never went away for me - even though it was so clear to every one of my co-workers that I was so in love with you.  Spencer would ask me everytime I worked with him "Did that boy propose yet?" I'd laugh and say "Nope, sure hasn't."  and he'd say "Why the hell not!?" :) Lots of people there were rooting for you - especially Bob and Bryan.  You knew they were tho, right? Even if you and I didn't make it down the aisle - they thought you were quite a guy, and that you were.  

Its still kinda crazy driving past places we used to hang out here in Greeley.  Still haven't gotten the guts to go to Pitchers of AF Rays...probably a good thing anyway because our friend Ryan T. got my fake taken away for being an idiot one night.  Oh well -- that thing was adding to my already way too fast growing up process. 

I'm going to get fish again!  I have no idea when, and I'm for sure getting a cat first - but before all that I have to find a place to live.  I'm looking for a cozy little 1 bedroom with not much space to fill because I don't have much anymore, and I will be living alone for a good looong time.  It was fun living with you babe, but I just don't exactly feel the same way about the idea of love anymore.  It will change with time, but for now I say its icky. :) 

So who knows if anyone else will post to this blog -- thought it would be an interesting little experiment.  If nothing else, maybe they won't even know its here and I can write to you and my daddy in heaven.  I know you could hear me no matter what, but I always loved writing you notes. 

All my love,

Ari